Welcome to Is This Shoe OK?, an infrequent column about shoes that may or may not be good, as determined by me—an authority, because I own shoes—and you, in the comments below. In today’s installment, we’re looking at an interesting take on religious wear: the $3000, sold out “Jesus shoe.”
The world is ending, so naturally sneakerheads—and regular folk like you and me—are looking for solace wherever we may find it. I just never expected to find it here, in a pair of Holy Water-filled, Frankincense-scented Nike Air Max 97s dubbed “Jesus Shoes.” Currently sold out but once sold for $1,425 and now going for $3,000 on online auctions, these shoes are actually beautiful—a crisp white color adorned by a crucifix, a pool-blue color highlighting the heavenly elixir within. I kind of get the appeal. I just don’t three thousand dollars get it?
Here’s the product description, via Vice:
The Vatican has mad style if you really look at it—dope engravings, crazy hats, everything blinged out with gold—so we wanted these shoes to allude to that.
The soles are filled with Holy Water (the water was originally sourced from the river Jordan, and then blessed).
The custom red insoles reference the traditional red shoes that the Pope wears, and the insoles are even scented with Frankincense, one of the gifts brought by the three wise men who traveled to greet Jesus after his birth.
The seal on the box is modified from the official Papal Seal, and the angel on the box is excerpted from Albrecht Durer’s 1514 engraving Melencolia I.
Here’s the thing: these are needlessly expensive, and if I’m remembering my childhood spent in Sunday school correctly, holy water is easily acquired—all you need is some regular H2O, blessed by a priest or some other clergy member. However, blatant displays of wealth feel distinctly un-Christian to me, and at a price that could pay my rent for a couple months… a waste of money? Let us not forget that these are Nike sneakers, too, a company infamous for their human rights abuses in their sweatshops. In my own life, I wouldn’t be caught dead wearing a Nike product, but I know other people’s ethical consumerism differs from my own. Perhaps I’d think these shoes were okay if they were, like, thrifted secondhand at Goodwill in three years time, but as it stands, that’s a no from me, dog.
But this series is about your dumb opinions, not ruminations from my idiot brain. Do you think these shoes are okay? What would make them okay? Drop that insight below.